Letting Go

I am often deceived by my own thoughts and beliefs, convincing myself that things will eventually improve. This self-deception arises from my deep capacity for love, which has become a constant source of punishment in my life. I carry the heavy burden of borderline personality disorder, a long-lasting condition that profoundly impacts the way I live. I made a mistake by allowing myself to fall deeply in love with someone who expected me to accept her involvement with another man.

Striving to do what I believed was morally right, I ultimately made the agonizing choice to let her go. This decision shattered me, revealing the harsh reality of a lonely existence that awaited me. The future is uncertain, yet I acknowledge the urgent need to break free from it all. I must escape, driven by desperation, much like anyone struggling to survive in their own circumstances. Increasingly, I feel disconnected from this world, as if I have exhausted every ounce of my abilities and loved with all my heart, only to doubt whether I will ever experience love in return. The weight of these experiences leaves me completely drained, both physically and emotionally, as if all my energy has been depleted.

The tiredness I feel is deep and overwhelming, as if every part of me has been completely exhausted. It's a form of weariness that affects not only my physical state but also my emotions. Every day feels like a struggle to continue, to gather the energy needed to confront the difficulties that await me. The lack of clarity about what lies ahead serves as a constant reminder of the hurdles I have to conquer and overcome in order to move forward.